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Kentucky Vs. Louisville 2013- "Shoot Low Boys, They're Riding Shetland Ponies"!!

As best as I can tell, God was undefeated in all sports last year. Anybody who won thanked Him, and I never heard a single loser blame Him- Lewis Grizzard

We all know where this is now, don't we?
We all know where this is now, don't we?

OK, so it is May. The Louisville football game is not for another four months. The Louisville basketball game is not for months. But that should not stop us from getting in a little jab or two in a kind of a pre-game warmup should it? Of course not!!

Let's see what we can do to fire up the competitive juices, shall we?

First off, this will be Rick Pitino's first season with a tattoo. Now most folks get drunk and go get a tattoo. Not Rick. He was stone cold sober when he got his. Then again, the last time Rick had a few too many and went out to do something foolish he ended up testifying in court. All in all, I say the tattoo was a fairly responsible act. And you know it had to have taken longer than 15 seconds.

Next, UL football is going to be "stronger" than ever (pun intended). Kentucky will still go into this season's game with the expectation of winning. Ahhhh, it's nice to be back. And may I just say, for the record, that when we do win, let's be civil and not trash talk our way around town for a year. That's just immature and uncivilized. Do that in the months leading up to the game, that way when you win it stings more.

Kentucky Basketball, Pre-season #1, Louisville #2. 'Nuff Said.

When was the last time that both of Kentucky's top colleges were this highly ranked going into the preseason? Never. I mean we do it all the time, but they only do it every once in a while so, they usually don't happen at the same time, etc. etc. etc. That's a crying shame. They really should be #2 more often!!

Sure to be uttered in Kentucky households this year:

"I'd rather be dead than red"

"Why do the Bluebloods get ALL the women?"

"Mamas don't let your babies grow up to be Cardinals"

" I know they're Louisville, but at least they ain't Duke"

"Pitino said what???"

"If we only still had Siva"

" How do you like your Cardinal, regular or extra crispy?"

"I wonder how much Calipari had to pay this group to come and play at Kentucky?"

Truth is definitely stranger than fiction. And funnier. The following quote came from a Louisville fan on the radio back when Rick was in his Sypher- ella days:

Pitino has a woman alleging rape and he is alleging extortion. Pitino cheated on his wife, had sex with a stranger at a table in a fancy restaurant, and gave her $3K for a medical procedure. And that's his side of the story.

Now I don't want to seem unfair and one-sided so I dug up some old Calipari stuff too:

*chirp, chirp*

And lest we forget the 2012 war of words between the coaches themselves:

"There's no other state, none, that's as connected to their basketball program as this one," Calipari said this year. "Because those other states have other programs. Michigan has Michigan State, California has UCLA, North Carolina has Duke. It's Kentucky throughout this whole state, and that's what makes us unique."

"Four things I've learned in my 59 years about people," Pitino responded. "I ignore the jealous, I ignore the malicious, I ignore the ignorant and I ignore the paranoid." It never ends. This what real hate looks like -- where you won't even give your rival that satisfaction of being hated. And I don't know whether we're talking about the coaches or the teams anymore."

And who can forget Rick's advice to UK when the coaching search that landed John Calipari at Kentucky began?

Well, If I haven't given you folks a enough to fuss about, reminisce about, and taunt your fellow man with, I don't know what else to do for you.