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Kentucky Basketball: The latest Calipari rumor -- unintended hilarity at its finest [UPDATED]

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K.C. Johnson of the Chicago Tribune wrote this article yesterday:

Another league source confirmed that an unknown Calipari connection contacted Bulls management over the weekend. This not only once again renders the coach's vows to remain at Kentucky hollow, it underscores the juggling act general manager Gar Forman and senior vice president John Paxson must navigate as they tackle a coaching search while planning for free agency, which begins July 1.

This paragraph is simply stiff with unintended hilarity.  An unnamed source "confirms" an "unknown Calipari connection?"  Really? 

So if I claim that an unnamed Dwarf confirmed that an unknown Elf communicated to him by an undisclosed means that LeBron James was forged in the Cracks of Doom in Orodruin by Sauron the Great himself, would Johnson print it as a rumor?  I'm beginning to think so.

Is this what passes four journalism these days at the Chicago Tribune?  Or will they claim that it is just a blog, so the rules don't apply?  One must usually go to a trailer park in middle Tennessee to find news of this quality, and I must have seen it re-tweeted a hundred times.

UPDATE:  At least this resembles real reporting.

UPDATE:  Gregg Doyel:

Calipari has already gone on the record, via his Twitter account which reaches all of Kentucky Nation (and then some), that he will not coach in the NBA next season . If he leaves for the NBA this offseason, he's a liar. Cynics among you will note that Calipari made a similar pronouncement last year when he was quoted as saying he planned to be at Memphis -- and then days later he was at Kentucky. I hear that.

But this is different, and here's why: If Calipari goes to the NBA with LeBron, not only is he a liar -- he's a stooge, too. He goes to the NBA as LeBron's lapdog, and I have to tell you, I don't see Calipari as being anyone's lapdog. [Emphaisis mine]

Doyel gets it exactly right.  This take makes far more sense that K.C. Johnson's anonymous confirmation of an unknown source.

UPDATE:  Eammon Brennan has thoughts.

UPDATE:  Katz issues a bit of a non-denial denial from another anonymous source, but it would seem to call Johnson's source into serious question.

UPDATE:  William Wesley says: ______________________.

UPDATE:  Dan Wolken -- bitter much?