Kentucky Basketball: Exclusive -- The Coach Cal / Terrence Jones Phone Conversation Revealed (satire)
by Glenn Logan on May 3, 2010 7:06 PM EDT
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A Sea of Blue has achieved a major scoop of all national media covering the, "Terrence Jones -- did he, or didn't he?" saga. I'm providing a transcript of this telephone conversation as a service to all the Calipari haters out there, including our new buddy Steve Kelly of the Seattle Times and an even newer Fox Sports talking head broadcasting from a pirate TV station hidden somewhere in the Puget Sound. I want to make sure they have validation for their opinions, and have something to point to as proof when someone calls them on their ignorance.
First a disclaimer. I love Washington, and I have been there. Back in 1986, I was serving aboard the USS Olympia, SSN 717. Olympia, as everyone should know, is the capitol of Washington State (but not all of you -- I see you back there through my backwards-looking Algore Model XV-21 Reverse-Internet Viewer, thinking, "I thought Seattle was the capitol."), and the USS Olympia was named not after the site of the Olympic games in ancient Greece, but after Olympia, Washington.
We steamed up the Puget Sound and pulled into Seattle, where I had some of the best pizza and beer ever, then cruised on up to the Port of Olympia the next day where we spend a glorious week among some of the finest folks you can imagine. Even the nuclear protesters, who were there waving death-heads and slogan-filled signs, treated us great. The area is breathtakingly beautiful (in a misty, rainy, Irelandy sort of way) and the people are simply to die for. Great place, make no mistake. Good people. The Olympia Brewery (which sadly closed in 2003) was like a shrine to me. Trust me, it's all good up there.
So this is not directed at the UW fans, or at Washingtonians, but rather at the "Cal is a greasy, oily, shady (and all those other anti-Italian racial slurs they can get away with because Italian-Americans are now considered non-minorities) people who have swallowed the media groupthink hook, line and sinker. It is for you, and in your honor, that I present the much-coveted conversation between Terrence Jones and Coach Calipari right after Jones' commitment. Note: Must credit A Sea of Blue.
*****Begin Transcript*****
Jones: Hello? Coach Cal?
Calipari: Yes?
Jones: This is Terrance Jones, coach. I just wanted to let you know ...
Calipari: You picked the Kentucky hat, right?
Jones: Well, I ...
Calipari: I saw you reach over to your right, and I was sure it was that white UK hat. Congratulations, son, you made the right call coming to the University of Kentucky.
Jones: But, coach, I ...
Calipari: Here at Kentucky you'll have the finest basketball facilities anywhere. You'll be playing with Brandon Knight and Doron Lamb and Enes Kanter, and you'll be playing before 24,000+ UK fans every single home game, and most away games where they have gym big enough. Great job, son, just great.
Jones: Uh, I picked Washington, coach, and I just ...
Calipari: Just wait till you see Big Blue Madness! Its ... ??? What did you say there, son? I thought for a second you ...
Jones (flustered): I picked Washington, coach! There, I said it. Washington!
Calipari (gravely): Terrence, are you sure?
Jones (confused): Well, uh ... yeah ...
Calipari: Are you really sure, Terrence. Think back, now.
Jones: I ... uhm ... I'm pretty sure it was the black one ...
Calipari (gravely): Son, this is the biggest decision of your life. This is huge. This is galactic. It's really important that you're sure.
Jones (nervous): You're right, coach. I need to be sure. I'm not so sure anymore.
Calipari: Terrence, did you sign anything?
Jones: No, but ...
Calipari: Terrence, are you sure?
Jones: Yeah, coach, I'm sure. But I was going to after I got off the phone with you.
Calipari: Terrence, may I make a suggestion?
Jones (uncertainly): Sure, coach ...
Calipari: Why don't you think about it a couple of days before you sign?
Jones: Well, I guess I could, but I just told everybody in the country, including my family and friends, that I was going to Washington, and I'd hate too look ...
Calipari: Terrence, I'm going to talk to you like a Dutch uncle here.
Jones: ???
Calipari: Here's the deal. Hold off for a couple of days, say until Tuesday of next week. Then call me and tell me who you want to sign with. Hold on just a sec ... (Calipari to Orlando Antigua sotto voce: Coach O, call up Ken and Sarah Ramsey and see if they can get me a horse's head. Yeah, yeah, I know it's a corny stereotype, just do it, will you?).
Jones: Coach ...?
Calipari: Sorry, Terrence. Just hold off till Tuesday, okay? Then, if you want to sign with Washington, I'll understand. Just call me and tell me you thought about it and you're going to be a Husky, okay?
Jones: But ...
Calipari: Terrence, you owe it to me for even considering you. I recruited you harder than anybody out of respect for your game and you as a person. I treated you like a son. I introduced you to LeBron James. You owe me this favor.
Jones (meekly): Well, okay coach. I guess a couple of days won't matter.
Calipari: Thank you, Terrence. I promise you you'll feel better about it Tuesday, whatever you decide.
Jones (convinced): You're right, coach. I'll wait, and then I'll call you Tuesday.
Calipari: Thank you, Terrence. Now go celebrate with your family, and I'll speak to you then.
Jones: Okay, coach. Goodbye.
Calipari: Goodbye. ::click::
*****End Transcript*****
***Bonus coverage***
Calipari to Antigua: Orlando, what did the Ramseys say?
Antigua: They said no problem, Coach.
Calipari: Good, good. I want you to go out to Portland and make the Joneses an offer they can't refuse, and assure them their son's signature or his severed right hand will be on that Kentucky letter of intent on Tuesday. You got me?
Antigua: Gotcha, coach. But Jones is left-handed ...
Calipari: Just do it, Orlando ...
Antigua: Okay, coach. Now how about some spaghetti and gravy?
Calipari: You read my mind.
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Har! Har! ..... LMAO
Good one Tru … Cal pressuring another commit …. now we now the secret – it’s the horse head ….
Reminds me of a movie from way back called “Used Cars” … The used car salesman had a dog trained to fake like he had been hit by the car when the guy was backing it out to take it for a ride…. so he could guilt him in to buying the car.
If I didnt know better Tru, I would think you were channeling your inner ME.......
I AM THE CAT......The Cat In The Hat!!!
for the record
it’s actually called Puget Sound
Also, Steve Kelley is a chump. I saw the article in the paper… then skipped it. And I’m glad I did.
And as a UW fan I look at Calipari and am not particularly impressed by his ethics (especially compared to Romar) but I do wish the people who don’t follow him closely wouldn’t be so quick to judge, especially when the facts are murky at best. It’s a lot of rumors based on rumors, and that’s pathetic. Also, just because Cal did some illegal things in the past doesn’t mean every move he makes is a sleazeball move; though, in all honesty he does make it easy for people to hate him.
Peugeot Sound...
is the French Canadian name. :-)
by BlueCollarMan on May 3, 2010 8:16 PM EDT up reply actions
makes sense
I figured there was something to it, but I tried google and it looks like it let me down
somehow...
my gut says Cal would have called it the Peugeot Sound….
only one rule in my house - uk has to be your favorite college bball team
by memphis wildcat on May 4, 2010 11:31 AM EDT up reply actions
AAARGGGHH!!!
I even looked it up and still got it wrong.
Yesterday was just a tough day all around, it seems. Thanks for the correction.
A Sea of Blue -- Kentucky Sports for the Discerning Fan
for the record
Sorry to burst your bubble, pal. So far John Calipari has not been accused of or found guilty by
anyone except the biased press and anti Kentucky people. And of course, legally, they don’t even count. Sure am glad of that.
A. M. Goodman
by WildcatBlue1930Adolph on May 4, 2010 9:31 AM EDT up reply actions
Spaghetti and Gravy!
Tru, you must have sailed that tin can with a bunch of east coast Italians. I’ve only heard tomato sauce referred to as “gravy” by guys like Rollie Massimino. Well done!
Thanks.
I’m just a Godfather addict. But we did have a few east coast Italians in there… :-)
A Sea of Blue -- Kentucky Sports for the Discerning Fan
And you say you don't do humor ;-)
Most excellent Tru !!!
Blue... there is no other color to Bleed !!!
That is SO funny!
I especially liked the part about the kid owning Cal for even considering him. I bet Cal thinks that about Kentucky having him as their shining Knight. No one in organized basketball could have come to Kentucky and gotten the Cats to the Elite Eight except him.
Certainly we own him much more than the almost four million he is making a year. I read somewhere Pitino is making four million a year but that must have been wrong. Didn’t he get to the Elite Eight in the 2009-2010 tournament? Must be the standard for coaches almost getting to the Final Four.
Of course this is in satire.
I heard they are going to raiise basketball ticket prices so I guess I’ll be owning Cal too.
I have be correctly accused of having a 'football fetish'. You know, someone who doesn't think football is the warm up sport to basketball season.
You sir get a rec
The Dutch uncle part cracked me up.
Then it comes to be that the soothing light at the end of your tunnel
is just a freight train coming your way.
I see Duke and Butler Are playing on December 4th.
Wouldn’t tt be great to bring in the eight teams, since we got that far, to play a mini tournament in Madison Square Garden before the season starts?
Can you imagine the interest in that? Not even a tournment. Just let the eight teams play who they did in that round/. But since that are going to have the final two teams I guess we can just watch and he envious. You don’t think Duke got this together to get another dig on us do you?
I have be correctly accused of having a 'football fetish'. You know, someone who doesn't think football is the warm up sport to basketball season.
Quite funny
I’m a big UW fan, but sometimes you just got to quit taking what an 18 year old kid does so seriously. No one at the UW was complaining when Neuheisel took us to the Rose Bowl, with his lax recruiting standards. It’s easy to see how my Husky brethren feel though. Kentucky already managed to get one player that had committed to us this year (Kanter)…I think they are starting to feel picked on by Calipari.
Cal and Jones (sattire)?
The story would be most humorous if it were objective. However it is, as you state, directed at coach Calipari. How about a “satire” article on the Rutgers coach who likes to drink and drive? LOL
A. M. Goodman
by WildcatBlue1930Adolph on May 4, 2010 9:21 AM EDT reply actions
That is funny stuff, but how many people will take it as the truth?
The ones that already hate the CATS and Coach Cal. Just Embrace the Hate. The horsehead may convince people that the coach is really a good guy they would want to know.
Tru,
First, full disclosure. I’m a Husky. I thought your take down of Steve Kelley was hilarious. He’s a pompous windbag who I haven’t been able to stand for many, many years. But I think you’ve missed the mark with this post. It’s just not that funny.
Anyway, there’s a question I want to ask you. Do you really think it’s unreasonable for non-Wildcats to think that Calipari is a bit on the sleazy side? Allow me to give you an example as to why some might feel that way:
At his press conference yesterday Calipari stated, “If he’s made a verbal commitment, we just lay off until the kid publicly de-commits, which has happened before.” Well, Enes Kanter never “publicly de-committed” from Washington and yet a few months later he was announcing a new commitment, to Kentucky.
Something’s amiss here, no?
Look, I’m sure a partisan Wildcat can come up with a spin or rationalization to explain away Calipari’s, dare I say it, lie. But reasonable people see that Calipari is not being forthright.
And that’s a little sleazy.
Cal recruiting Kanter
Please check out this interview with Kanter’s high school coach.
http://www.mynorthwest.com/?nid=189&sid=301623
Also, in a Study in America.com interview (for a Turkish audience), Cal said Kanter sought him out and Kanter nodded in agreement.
http://www.studyinamerica.com/exclusive/special-interview-john-calipari-enes-kanter/
starts c. 10:40.
Can’t find much sleeze, here.
No matter where you're at, there you are
Chickens will roost
You are living in a fantasy land. Enes’ coach and Enes say nothing pertinent in either link. Cal says that Kanter initiated the contact but you can’t rely on that as evidence for whether or not he is a liar. He doesn’t mention whether Kanter had de-committed at that point, but we all know that he had not. Enes himself said that “I decommitted because bigger programs became interested.” One wonders how he knew that those other programs became interested while Cal was “laying off”. The reality is, this guy plays word games and is sleazy. UW had one of them, his name was Rick Neuheisel. He killed our football program for the last 10 years.
Straight up Kentucky fans, you have an amazing program and are better than this guy. Unfortunately, it sounds like you’re going to have to learn it the hard way.
So read my comment just below this one ...
… and you will see that Kanter did de-commit, publicly, before being recruited by Coach Cal.
A Sea of Blue -- Kentucky Sports for the Discerning Fan
Where?
Where does it say in there that he de-committed publicly before being recruited by Cal? I have no idea when he was being recruited by Cal. Taking all facts available in a light most favorable to Kentucky, let’s say your guy was completely in the clear on this one. My bad. Oh, and best of luck in the long run with that coach of yours, you can only dance on the head of a pin for a limited period of time before you end up falling…you’re obviously drinking the Kool-Aid but don’t say you weren’t warned.
He decommitted on or before Feb 29th.
Scout is reporting that Kanter is now going to look at a few other schools including Florida State, Kentucky and Syracuse …
Had Kanter been in contact with Calipari before that? Boeheim? Hamilton?
If you are going to assume one contacted him before his de-commitment, it is only logical to conclude that all the rest of them did, as well.
Bottom line, you are fishing. He de-committed from UW, then signed with Kentucky about a month later. Get over it. It happens every year. Calipari was evidently being truthful, and you are evidently determined to make him out a liar no matter what the facts suggest.
A Sea of Blue -- Kentucky Sports for the Discerning Fan
I don’t know how it played out, but the facts suggest that the Cal was in touch with him prior the de-commit. That said, Enes may have initiated it. I don’t know and neither do you.
Either way, you have been warned. Teflon Cal is going to get sticky at some point, you’d just better hope its after he’s long gone.
Thanks for the warning.
You must be the 15,000th person to warn us about Calipari.
I think we’ll be fine.
A Sea of Blue -- Kentucky Sports for the Discerning Fan
Cite your source, brother
the facts suggest that the Cal was in touch with him prior the de-commit.
and
Enes himself said that "I decommitted because bigger programs became interested."
No matter where you're at, there you are
Oh, and ...
… what facts suggest that Calipari was in touch before Kanter de-committed? I see none here.
Kanter had over a month to make up his mind, from Feb 9th to around March 23rd.
Then, there is this, which explains that Calipari only learned about Kanter after a call from his high school coach expressing interest on Kanter’s behalf.
No matter what, Kanter, or his representatives, contacted Calipari. Whether that was before or after his de-commitment from Washington, the article doesn’t say. But it could have easily been after, and frankly, I can think of no reason not to take Calipari at his word.
A Sea of Blue -- Kentucky Sports for the Discerning Fan
Sorry you didn't like the piece.
Anyway, there’s a question I want to ask you. Do you really think it’s unreasonable for non-Wildcats to think that Calipari is a bit on the sleazy side? Allow me to give you an example as to why some might feel that way:
As for Kanter not de-commiting first, what can this mean, then, from our SBNation brothers at UWDawgPound? Sure looks like a public de-commitment to me. It took me longer to link it than it did to find.
Something is amiss here? No indeed.
So this defeats your argument that he lied about Kanter utterly and completely. So please feel free to publicly apologize to Coach Cal for calling him a liar.
A Sea of Blue -- Kentucky Sports for the Discerning Fan
I guess Kanter should have bought a billboard in Seattle to publically de-commit.....
Then it comes to be that the soothing light at the end of your tunnel
is just a freight train coming your way.
Utterly and completely?
Um, no.
That link does not in any way prove your point, hence no apology forthcoming. How is it that Kanter came to have Kentucky on his list? You’ll need to prove that Kanter had no contact with anyone representing Kentucky while he was publicly committed to Washington in order to get an apology.
That is an extremely difficult burden of proof to be sure and not entirely fair but it’s where we are. When a kid publicly de-commits from a school after saying that bigger programs have expressed interest and then Kentucky is listed as a program in which the kid has interest the burden of proof is placed on Calipari to prove that he’s not lying.
Oh, and you’re welcome for my complimentary comments about your Steve Kelley column.
Well ...
That link does not in any way prove your point, hence no apology forthcoming. How is it that Kanter came to have Kentucky on his list?
That might be a fair question about Florida State. Syracuse and Kentucky are kind of known for their basketball. UW and FSU, not so much.
The burden of proof is 100% on you. You are the one making the charge, and there are no known facts whatsoever that support your claim. You can’t shift the burden of proof to Coach Cal, because he has already stated his position. Remember, it is the accuser who must prove the claim. That’s debate (and law) 101.
A Sea of Blue -- Kentucky Sports for the Discerning Fan
The burden of proof is not on me. You were the one asking for a retraction. I told you what would be required to obtain one. However, if Coach Calipari would like to sue me for calling him a LIAR, and he is one, I’d be happy to appear in court.
Although before that I would most enjoy the Discovery process.
Oh ...
… did I forget to thank you? My apologies.
Thanks very much.
A Sea of Blue -- Kentucky Sports for the Discerning Fan
Very funny
I think this is the best part:
Calipari: Terrence, I’m going to talk to you like a Dutch uncle here.
Jones: ???
Who knew Jones could speak in question marks?
3 > 2, except for very large values of 2.
by JLeverenz on May 4, 2010 12:34 PM EDT reply actions 1 recs
FF3 is best
Haven’t you ever played Final Fantasy?
by JortsKicksAss on May 4, 2010 3:56 PM EDT up reply actions
Chrono Trigger is best
I bet you haven’t
by JortsKicksAss on May 5, 2010 1:21 PM EDT up reply actions
I have
Nice reference, but I’d have to disagree about FF3 (actually FF6, if you count the Japan-only titles). FF7 and FFX were much better.
Played them all
Keep going back to III. 7 and X were, in fact, great too.
by JortsKicksAss on May 5, 2010 2:13 PM EDT up reply actions
Kafka could speak in !!!!!'s
At least he’s not talking like a dutch oven
by JortsKicksAss on May 5, 2010 1:21 PM EDT up reply actions
Ya'll lost this ole guy!!
Happy Days are here again The sky is all ways BLUE again Happy days are here again !
Kafka?
Dutch Oven: The act of dropping out a vicious, vile fart while in bed and then holding the head of a loved one underneath the covers so they can feel the full effect.
by JortsKicksAss on May 5, 2010 2:45 PM EDT up reply actions
Apparently
Evan Daniels just tweeted that Terrence Jones has decommitted from Washington.
FWIW
It is not worth an intelligent man’s time to be in the majority. By definition, there are already enough people to do that.
by kentuckygirl0724 on May 4, 2010 3:18 PM EDT reply actions
But did he announce it in public.....in front of a billboard....with a bullhorn?
Then it comes to be that the soothing light at the end of your tunnel
is just a freight train coming your way.
Not yet ..
but he is searching for a notary public! :D
Man. I was really hoping this was going to be funny.
I guess you Kentucky bumpkins just kind of march to your own drum down there.
It took this one all of 2 minutes to post!
A total waste of both our times!
Happy Days are here again The sky is all ways BLUE again Happy days are here again !
Stay classy chief
Then it comes to be that the soothing light at the end of your tunnel
is just a freight train coming your way.
"Don't Tase Me Bro"
Go get him Coach Cal…..don’t listen to all the chatter. If Jones want to come to UK, he should be able to do it. And if he wants to stay at UW, then he should.
The entire sports world (outside of Kentucky) hates Coach Cal and UK. No matter what he does, people will criticize him and usually with false information. So, do what you gotta do and let the chips fall where they may.
In the immortal words of Randy Macho Man Savage, “If you aren’t living on the edge, you are taking up too much room.”
Slower Traffic Keep Right!
by SevenRings on May 4, 2010 7:02 PM EDT reply actions 2 recs
I see now
This is one reason the grade level is so low at Kentucky basketball . Do you really believe that Jones is that Dumb. And that gullible. Do you think that he really acted like a little kid not knowing what he wanted. Im sorry that you people are that ignorant. And are willing to lie to yourselves. But the truth here is, this was jones’s moment. This was his time to celebrate. And the interference of this coach, was simply, a lack of respect for this young man. And honestly this – article – was simply a lack of respect for Terrance Jones. I hope he picks the Huskies where he will be respected.
Damn, who knew Washington had so many fans
These trolls are hilarious though.
Then it comes to be that the soothing light at the end of your tunnel
is just a freight train coming your way.
Who knew Seattle has
a eighteen foot troll under a bridge. The best part,
interaction with the troll is encouraged.;-)
Blue... there is no other color to Bleed !!!
If Washington basketball went away,
I’m sure dozens of people would care. Should Jones go to Kentucky or Washington? Does he want the Beatles or Strawberry Alarm Clock? Actually, that’s an insult to SAC. At least they had one number one hit.
Things are more like they are today than they ever have been.
by 6-6withglacialspeed on May 4, 2010 11:07 PM EDT reply actions
Troll by your terms.
In your mind, is a troll a) ANY visitor/fan from another team; b) a visitor/fan with a different opinion than yours; c) a mouthy antagonist; d) all of the above; or e) other?
Anybody?
Neither
Visitors with differnt opinions are welcome. Trolls are those who can’t support any supposed “facts” so they resort to douche baggerry…….
Then it comes to be that the soothing light at the end of your tunnel
is just a freight train coming your way.
I think the main thing is
if you’re a fan of another team—especially if you’re not a regular poster but have just now joined only to comment about a prickly issue between our two teams—coming here to OUR home, a blog for and by Kentucky fans—you have to tread very carefully not to come off like a jerkface troll. Say, by keeping a friendly tone, avoiding antagonistic language and not making snide jokes at our team’s expense. You might point out that the standards are higher for visitors, because some of OUR posters certainly make snide jokes at the expense of other teams—but like I said, this is OUR home. I’m not going to come to YOUR house, help myself to the liquor cabinet and the silver, and insult your religious and political beliefs—but all these things I may do in my OWN home : )
by blue kentucky girl on May 5, 2010 9:43 AM EDT up reply actions
you get into my liquor cabinet you better be ready to pour me one there bkg....lol....
and no discussion of relifion OR politics until after the 4th or 5th shot……lol…..
I AM THE CAT......The Cat In The Hat!!!
That pretty much sums it up
Thanks, that’s exactly like I see it. We’re experiencing the same thing on our blogs. Unfortunately, anybody can sign in as anybody, so you get j*ck*ss imposters that are simply there to stir things up. I must admit however, if not for the little battle between UW & UK I wouldn’t check in here…. it’s an interesting perspective though.
Well said.
There are some crazy UK blogs our there, but this isn’t one of them.
We’re all biased, but Tru is a fair editor, and we really like having thoughtful fans of other programs come here and share their perspective with us.
thanks
and TRUST ME, I know Kentucky fans, being one and living amongst them. I know you’re probably getting the worst kind of trolldom on Washington boards from some of the more uncouth among us. I wish that were not the case, but I’m sure it’s true. When you’re talking about as large and as passionate group of people as UK basketball fans, you’re going to have a rather larger than average share of your loudmouth jackasses. So I apologize for our crazy relatives mucking up YOUR homes ; )
by blue kentucky girl on May 5, 2010 11:42 AM EDT up reply actions
Jones and Romar
Here is the one thought that will hopefully put Jones’ mind at rest so he can move forward: He said upon choosing UW that he thought of Romar as a father. Well, this means he trusts him more than he does any other coach who recruited him including Cal. Knowing what Romar thinks of Cal’s tactics after the news conference and his reference in his press conference to say what he thinks of coaches that recruit that way…all Jone’s has to do is trust his gut about why he trusts Romar. Because if what Romar says is true, and I believe it is, then Jones can be thankful to play for Romar as opposed to Cal. Can’t wait to play UK in Maui!!
We'll see, I guess.
Calipari has never given a single player a reason not to trust him that I know of, at least while he has been at UK.
I don’t blame you for thinking more highly of Romar, but that’s just partisanship. There’s nothing that I know of that shows Romar is a better man.
It would be great if UW and UK got to play in Maui. I hope it happens.
A Sea of Blue -- Kentucky Sports for the Discerning Fan
spaghetti and gravy/Dutch uncle/Maui game
Tru, love your post…good job…and i’m glad to see you holding your/our ground w/that troll…UW people should be used to “change” ie: the weather patterns…would just like to remind everybody to read my sig line as i sign off on this one…
"Get your facts first, then you can distort them as much as you please."...Mark Twain.
Said it in a new post.
I’ve been out of pocket for a while, and Ken’s computer is Tango Uniform. We’ll get caut
A Sea of Blue -- Kentucky Sports for the Discerning Fan
I think I meant to finish that sentence with ...
… “We’ll get caught up soon.” :-)
A Sea of Blue -- Kentucky Sports for the Discerning Fan
Tango Uniform??
It is said that"You need to learn something everyday" I’m waiting!!
Happy Days are here again The sky is all ways BLUE again Happy days are here again !
"Tango Uniform"
Or T.U. = Dead. The direct translation is “tits up,” i.e. lying on your back, dead. :-)
A Sea of Blue -- Kentucky Sports for the Discerning Fan
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