TOP ELEVEN THINGS TO REMEMBER ABOUT JOHN WALL
remember - John Wall goes to ELEVEN!
11) The Boston Red Sox wanted to rename the Green Monster to the Green Wall and John Wall said, "No, it would be too intimidating to Yankee Batters."
10) John Wall doesn't shoot circus/lucky shots... the ball simply obeys his will
9) John Wall isn't scared of IV needles like the Louisville Papers claim...the needles were scared of him.
8) John Wall is faster than advertised... he just slows down so we can still see him with our pitiful human eyes
7) John Wall reportedly beat a Jaguar downcourt to dunk on Jerry Stackhouse - that's just nonsense, Jaguar's are for 2nd round picks
6) John Wall didn't go to UNC because Roy Williams tried to and couldn't contain him
5) John Wall isn't afraid to turnover the ball - the ball is afraid of what John Wall will do next if it bounces away from him.
4) John Wall doesn't see nearby teams as rivalries - that would mean that they were even close to his talent
3) John Wall does not have a drink named after him at Two Keys Tavern in Lexington - it was a mistake and Two Keys has paid dearly for their blasphemy. They will have to paint the entire building RED until John Wall says so
2) John Wall halted production of Cougar Town when he heard Courtney Cox liked the John Wall dance her co-star was doing...John Wall doesn't need Friends
1) John Wall isn't Blue Jesus - Jesus is Pink John Wall!