Scouting report on Patrick Patterson-

The University of Kentucky Wildcats have a player named Patrick Patterson. Here is a scouting report from the NCAA Hoops department here at TFDS who just happens to have some inside info:

Patrick Patterson is old for a college athlete, and has nearly zero vertical leap, and shoots free throws so bad he makes Shaq look automatic. He also smokes a pack or so a day, and rather than wearing the usual blue and white has been seen exclusively in Silver and Black.

Oh wait, thats me. Hopefully, my namesake can be a good player for the ‘Cats and help them make some noise. I’ll make him a deal, I’ll stay off the NCAA hardwood if he doesn’t try to take over TFDS.